Your Unemployed Daughter

photo credit: VancityAllie

Today’s post will be short because, let’s face it, you’re probably not reading, so ensconced are you in your multitudinous preparations for a magnificent feast. And I’ve got a train to catch: I’m off to the first New England Thanksgiving (minus M&D) in my family’s capricious and roving history, I do believe.

As always, the freelance life and the holiday life create a strange “vacation vector” in which work has still to be done, and yet, you don’t want to do it because all of the fully employed people have days off. Or, the converse: You have and haven’t had work in ages, so a holiday is just another day to you.

The difference with this holiday, however, is food. Namely, turkey. And while yesterday’s post may have gotten the sensitive among you concerned about sustainability and animal rights and the purpose of presidential pardons (No Turkey Left Behind!), this post will set you right.

Listen, turkeys are bullies. They steal little boy’s bikes. They hate mailmen. I have it on good authority that they may be racist. And they’re plotting to take over the world.

Don’t watch this if The Birds gives you the willies.

But, they taste good. And they are good for you, too! High in protein, low in fat; my personal trainer recommends turkey to me almost daily (not Wild Turkey, but what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him).

Also, turkey is the perfect accompaniment to another perfect accompaniment. Stuffing. If I could live on one thing for the rest of my life, I think the choices would come down to pizza, buffalo chicken fingers, or stuffing. I know, I’m gross. (Oooh, or maybe cheese. Or wine.)

Those are the most delicious foodstuffs in the world. And tonight, at least one will be mine. And yours.

If you’re feeling depressed about lack of job prospects, eat. If you’re excited that you just got offered a job, eat. If you’re hungry, eat. If a turkey has one gift for you, it’s letting you consume it for fortification in times of economic trouble. So eat. Please?

Otherwise I’d bet my last nickel that wild turkeys are going to attack me on my Schwinn next time I take it for a spin, and I’ve had enough harrowing bike experiences this year.

Happy Thanksgiving,
YUD