Your Unemployed Daughter

photo credit: whatmeworry101

Boozing (particularly wine drinking) has to be one of the best things in the world that humanity can do for itself. Pour me a delicious Gruner or seven the evening after a stressful day and I will fall into your arms and heave a great sigh of contentment. Assuming you have arms.

That’s why something like this disturbs me to my very core.

Thanks to a new technique developed by Russian professor Evgeny Moskalev, now you can get drunk without drinking. Moskalev has created an “alcohol pill” using a method that transforms alcohol into a powder, which can then be packed into potent pills.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I enjoy some (many) of the intoxicating effects of booze—not the hangovers, but at least the light and giddy feeling, the relaxation, the sassy reflections that ensue … up to a point. But then you’ve got black-outs, or brown-outs, or rages that you have to apologize for the next day even though you don’t really remember them…

So why would you want to just get drunk without the best part, that is, actually tasting the beverage of your choice? If you’re going to pop pills, shouldn’t they be pills of a different variety? Because I like—nay, love—drinking wine. No problem with that part of things. A an anti-hangover pill that would stave off the aftermath of the vino blitz is a different story altogether.

The claim is that booze “in the form of a pill would come handy at parties when ‘consumers’ would be able to calculate their exact required dosage.”

That, my friend, does not sound like a party.