In celebration of all this turkey biz-nizz, our most disturbing Alaskan frenemy—yes, I’m speaking of she-who-must-not-be-named—ran herself a race.
No, sillies! Not that kind of race. Please, never again that kind of race.
photo credit: Nick Bastian Tempe, AZ
The word “thankful” tends to stick in my craw a little bit, maybe because I grew up in the South and people used to bandy it about as often as “God bless,” “Bless her heart,” and “Isn’t that sweet!” in tones that meant, frequently, the very opposite of what Mr. Webster originally intended.
It’s the word more than the sentiment, though, that bugs me. Because I really am thankful for stuff. I am! I just don’t post it on Facebook a lot, or tell anyone except my stuffed animals.
Imagine my surprise when—after a Union-Square-based meeting to discuss a potential job opportunity, the requisite trip to Barnes and Noble, a visit to Lululemon for workout gear, and a stop by Sephora for a replacement compact—I arrived in the vicinity of home, looked up, and found myself face-to-face with this display of fall foliage.
Only moments before, I’d also come upon a fruit market and procured three giant, juicy apples.
This all drives home the point that it’s only a week til Thanksgiving, as I was reminded earlier today. And yet, I feel so YOUNG! How the time flies.
POP QUIZ: Can you answer the following about the picture?
photo credit: ShawnHasIssues
Hey, hey, so, news y’all! Remember how the peeps at Walmart got all shithouse-rat-CRAZY last year waiting in line to storm the barracks (I mean, store) when it opened at 5 am on the day after Thanksgiving? And some poor employee got stomped to death in our boisterous Middle American friends’ pursuit of a bargain-priced flat-screen?
Well, worry ye not. Walmart’s bigwigs have put their heads together this time and come up with a fail-proof plan. See, they know a lot of people are unemployed, or tightening belts, or cheaper than they ever were, cheap bastards. Thus:
photo credit: lepiaf.geo
Oooh, November. It seems like I hardly even got to know you, October. You were a real blur, thanks to a wedding, several birthdays, 2.5 freelance projects, Halloween, and, of course, too too too much wine.
I woke up this morning thinking, hmm, maybe I should try to go the month of November without drinking (alcohol, that is). Why did I think this? It may have something to do with that Deal or No Deal thermos I kept refilling with Barefoot Sauvignon Blanc, or attempting to rip the head off of one of the Gosselin children (a costume!), or the fact that my Taxi and Limousine-commissioned car service driver, to whom I thought it was wise to spill my guts, was totally putting the moves on. (He was quite sweet, btw.) Or maybe it’s just the usual morning after guilt.
