28
Nov
Posted in Bullshit Detector | No Comments »

photo credit: RBerteig
In celebration of all this turkey biz-nizz, our most disturbing Alaskan frenemy—yes, I’m speaking of she-who-must-not-be-named—ran herself a race.
No, sillies! Not that kind of race. Please, never again that kind of race.
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Tags: giblets to the gravy, kennewick, quitters don't win, sarah palin, sarah quits race, she who must not be named, thanksgiving, turkey hop, turkey trot, voldemort, voldemortina, washington
3
Oct
Posted in Weekenders | No Comments »

photo credit: the_vampire_hanna
Today I’m off to boxing class, and then to the Connecticut wedding of my dear friend C. and her lovely about-to-be husband S.
Punching plus nuptials. How apropro.
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Tags: all-night dance-a-thon, boston, cape cod, computer baby, connecticut wedding, D.C., firstborn, florida, good traveler, jamaica, mac, mind and memory, mini cooper, mommy, mommy and baby, montauk, separation anxiety, washington
29
Sep
Posted in Stranger Than Fiction | No Comments »

photo credit: yewenyi
Ever notice how certain cities, like New York, Boston, and Washington, DC, have more nail salons per block than Starbucks? And they offer cheap, quality services—on certain nights of the week, your mani and pedi might even run you less than your fancy caffeinated bev and pumpkin bread snack. And it will sure as hell last you longer.
On the other side of the coin we have places like my parents’ neck of the woods in Florida, where strip malls feature a higher ratio of hospital equipment stores and check-cashing venues to spas or cofffeshops. It all depends on where you live, I suppose.
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Tags: boston, brooks locke, D.C., getting the milk for free, illinois, job lessons, kishwaukee community college, malta, nail salons, nails times, new york, renew and relax, starbucks, washington
26
Sep
Posted in Bullshit Detector | No Comments »

photo credit: Kevin Labianco
I’m in D.C. now. Yeah, YUD gets around. Why not? I have the time.
At any rate, D.C. is the town that I lived in as an undergraduate, attending the refined Jesuit institution known as Georgetown, despite the fact that I am neither Catholic nor religious. One of the best things about being taught by priests, however, besides the consistency of their dress code and lack of temper tantrums, was that they were endlessly forgiving.
Before I realized that I was really just not a morning person, I took a series of 8:15 and 8:30 classes, among them Chinese (don’t ask). And I would inevitably do the nod & bob for half the class and intermittently fall asleep. My notes from that period were a trail of scrawl.
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Tags: beginner mistake, blue moon, D.C., failure to staple, fibbers, georgetown university, high-powered media exec, jesuit institution, laryngitis, low-level employee, lying to a priest, Post-It notes, washington, workplace lies